* * * * * * * *

At the Hikawa Shrine the next afternoon, plans were laid and strategies reviewed. "Usagi and Mamoru, you're coming with me," Nephrite said. "Usagi, can you do the disguise magic with Mamoru's car?"

"I think so," she answered. "As long as at least one of us is touching it. We all have to be in contact for the disguise power to work."

"Good. Now, Ami, Makoto, and Minako, you three be ready to back us up if we need help. You say you can teleport to a location you've never seen before?"

"Yes," Ami said. "Especially if we're in contact over the communicator, the three of us can easily teleport to where you are."

"What about me?" Rei asked.

"You stay here. Listen to me," Nephrite added as Rei began to steam and turn red. "You're too emotionally involved in this. Emotional involvement leads to bad decisions."

"I don't care. If Yuuichirou needs me, I'm going."

"Rei. Do I have to order you to stay?"

"Order me? ORDER me? Who do you think --"

"Rei-chan." Yuuichirou spoke up. "I think he knows what he's talking about. Just do what he says, ok?"

Rei looked around the rest of the group for support, without finding any. "Trust him, Rei," Naru said softly.

"Besides," Nephrite added, "I don't want Naru left here alone."

"All right, I guess I'll stay. But that isn't a promise!"

Nephrite laughed as he led the group outside to the Shrine's small parking lot, while Rei fumed behind his back. "Give us about a ten-minute head start, Yuuichirou, so we can check things out and watch you go in. After that, be ready to run if we say so. Usagi, are you ready with that disguise pen?"

"Yep. Hold on!" She held the disguise pen high in her right hand. She, Mamoru, and Nephrite gripped each other's hands and Nephrite put his left hand on Mamoru's red car. Usagi waved the pen and shouted, "Disguise power, turn us into a bunch of... tragically hip record company executives with a black BMW!"

There were shimmering swirls of light, which quickly cleared to reveal the sleek black car and the three people standing beside it. Mamoru and Nephrite wore slick, wide-shouldered suits over tight black t-shirts, and long ponytails. Mamoru, who had never worn earrings, had a diamond dangling from his left earlobe, while Nephrite had a hoop in each ear next to the gold studs he always wore. They both wore black sunglasses with tiny oval lenses. Usagi had a blonde buzz cut, and wore a chartreuse suit whose jacket was longer than the microscopic skirt. She had on a black bustier under the jacket, black Doc Marten boots, and sunglasses with inch-wide purple lenses. "Hey, it worked!" she chirped happily.

Yuui and the girls were speechless. "Wow," Naru finally said. Minako and Makoto couldn't restrain themselves any longer, and started laughing and pointing at Usagi. "Hey, that's a great look for you, Usagi! No more meatballs!"

Usagi patted her hair with a look on her face that made the other Sailor Senshi fall down laughing. "Don't worry, Dumpling Head, they'll grow back!" Mamoru gasped between howls of laughter.

"I didn't mean it to come out quite that short," Usagi said. "It is tragically hip, though. Besides, it's only pretend."

Nephrite looked at his watch. "Time to get going. Remember, Yuuichirou, ten minutes. And try to look like you actually want the job." He came over to Naru, pulled her close, and kissed her deeply. "Don't worry, Naru-chan, ok?"

Naru nodded. "I'll try."

Nephrite went to the BMW' and opened a back door to get in. "Mamoru, you drive over. I'll handle the getaway, if we have to make one." Usagi and Mamoru climbed into the front seat, and the car drove off.

Those remaining stared after the car for a moment, then Yuuichirou took Rei by the hand and led her around a corner. "Let me know when it's time, ok?"

Soon enough, Makoto had to go pry them apart, and the girls watched as Yuuichirou's car disappeared into the city below the hill. Naru and Rei looked at each other, Naru trying to think of what comfort she could give Rei when she was scared to death herself. But Rei spoke first. "I'm sorry, Naru-chan, but how can you stand being married to that arrogant jerk?"

Naru felt a wave of pure rage wash over her, that Rei should speak of Nephrite that way. Easy, she told herself. She's scared and she doesn't know yet that she can trust him.

"He seems like he's a really nice man, Rei-chan," Ami was saying.

"Yeah, Rei," Makoto added. "I don't know what your problem is."

"So if he's such a great guy, then why'd he join the Dark Kingdom in the first place?" Rei demanded. "Tell me that."

Naru closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I don't know, Rei. He hasn't told me that. All he's told me is that he betrayed everything he was, everything he believed in, by joining the Dark Kingdom. What he wants the most is to become the person he was before he fell. He's trying so hard, Rei, and he's a good, good man. Please trust him. Please give him a chance."

"I'm so scared," Rei said, "and I can't do anything to help." Angrily, she wiped away the tear that ran down her cheek.

Naru took one of Rei's hands in both of her own. "I know, Rei-chan. I'm scared, too.

"Hey," Minako spoke up brightly, "I brought something to kill the time." She held up a deck of cards in one hand and a huge bag of chocolate caramels in the other. "Poker and chocolate." The five girls settled happily at the table, which had Luna and Artemis dozing in the middle. Ami dealt the cards while Minako divvied out the chocolates.

"Why can't they ever be serious?" Luna muttered to Artemis.

"I think they are serious," Artemis replied.

* * * * * * * *

The three record company executives' sat in their black BMW in the parking lot of the auditorium where the auditions were being held, until they saw Yuuichirou's car arrive. They followed him in at a discreet distance and took seats near the back of the auditorium. They noted where the other exits from the hall were, and looked over the layout and who was there. On the stage was a huge drum set and sound system. Half a dozen hopeful drummers, including Yuuichirou, sat in the center of the front row, while three men who looked like roadies, with their tight t-shirts and bulging muscles, sat near the right end of that row. Halfway back in the hall, towards the left side, sat three men in black turtlenecks. One had long, silvery hair, the second wore a long, tawny ponytail, and the third man had short, thick blond hair.

"That's all three of them," Nephrite whispered to Mamoru, who sat between him and Usagi. Mamoru nodded and pointed out the three to Usagi, who also nodded.

In the center of that same row, a few seats away from the others, sat another man. He had a huge volume of wildly shaggy hair, black with jagged white stripes running through it. He wore a black sleeveless t-shirt, displaying scrawny, pale, heavily tattooed arms. "That must be our friend Mazz," Mamoru whispered.

Nephrite closed his eyes, trying to get a sense of the rock star's energy. "He's Dark Kingdom, all right. Very powerful. I'd be willing to bet he's Beryl's replacement."

The other drummers all went before Yuuichirou. They were obviously ringers brought in to make the audition look legitimate; their qualifications mostly seemed to be that they could count to four and move both hands and both feet at the same time. Each one played a solo, then played along with a tape, minus the drum track, of a Mazz Destrukshun so-called song.

Nephrite rubbed his forehead, where a killer of a headache was starting to come on, and sighed with relief as the last drummer before Yuuichirou was dismissed. People actually paid money to listen to this? Humans...

Yuuichirou walked onto the stage, sat at the drum set, and made a few adjustments to the stool and the placement of the various components of the set. He juggled his drumsticks in his hands and said, "Before I start, I just want to say what an honor this is, Mr. Destrukshun. This is, like, totally a dream come true for me. I really hope I get the job, but it's just so, like, totally bodacious that you even asked me to try out."

Nephrite smiled a little, approvingly. If the boy couldn't make it as a musician, he could always be an actor. He glanced sideways at Mamoru and Usagi; they were both red-faced and teary-eyed in their efforts to not laugh.

Then Yuuichirou began to play his solo. Nephrite sat back, truly impressed. The boy (he reminded himself that the boy was twenty-five years old) had real talent. He whispered to Mamoru, "I had no idea Yuuichirou was so good. He reminds me of some of the great jazz drummers, Elvin Jones, Art Blakey, Buddy Rich. He could be that good."

Mamoru nodded with the air of a man who also knew his jazz, while Usagi sat open-mouthed and entranced. The recorded song came on, thankfully for the last time, and Yuuichirou did things to make it actually sound like something vaguely resembling music. That took talent.

Yuuichirou's audition ended, and the three executives sat up straight, on the alert now. Mazz Destrukshun and his three associates stood and filed out of the row where they had been sitting. The Lords stood in front of the stage, discussing something, while Mazz himself went up onto the stage and over to Yuuichirou. He reached up to put an arm around the tall drummer's shoulders. The rock star's face was completely obscured by white greasepaint, with black lightning bolts around the eyes and black lipstick. "I wonder," Usagi whispered, "if there's really a face under there or if it's like the Invisible Man when he takes his makeup off."

"Yuuichirou," the rock star said in a surprisingly mild, mellow voice, "you're the man, dude. Welcome to the team. Come on, the rest of the band is waiting back at the hotel. Time to go rehearse."

Nephrite sat on the edge of his seat, poised to jump up and start running.

"Actually, Mr. Destrukshun, this is so totally great, but I, like, told my girlfriend I'd be home? So I have to go, but I'll come to the hotel in, like, a couple of hours, Ok?"

"Sorry, dude, you're coming with us now." The voice had grown harsh and hissing. The three Lords signaled to the roadies, who stood and rushed onto the stage. Their bodies distorted, becoming monstrously over-muscled, their skin turned purple and their eyes glowed red. Nephrite began to run towards the stage. Behind him, Usagi and Mamoru transformed, and Sailor Moon began one of her patented speeches, "I'm Sailor Moon, the champion of --"

"Can the speech and get him out of here!" Nephrite yelled. "I'll cover you!" His three former colleagues, hatred in their faces, turned towards him at the sound of his voice, but they reacted too late. He shot half a dozen balls of blue energy out of his right hand, knocking them down in a heap against the edge of the stage, and kept them down by firing off another shot of energy every time one of them moved. There was much to be said for the element of surprise.

The three roadie-youma had grabbed Yuuichirou, and were hauling him towards a rear exit from the stage. Yuui was putting up a good fight, being a healthy-sized young man and a skilled martial arts fighter, but the three muscle-bound youma posed unbeatable odds. Nephrite didn't dare blast them because Yuuichirou might get hurt, but it turned out he didn't have to. Tuxedo Mask took out one of the youma with a red rose right to the eyes, while Sailor Moon knocked down a second with a high leaping kick. Nephrite kept those two down with blasts of energy, while still keeping the Lords under control. He was starting to get fatigued, and knew that soon his energy would be completely drained. They had to get Yuuichirou away from the last youma so Sailor Moon could do her Tiara thing.

Mazz Destrukshun was hiding in the curtains off stage. He was keeping Tuxedo Mask and Sailor Moon off-balance by firing off poorly-aimed but powerful bolts of black lightning from his hands. Nephrite quickly determined that if he ran the long way around, behind Tuxedo Mask, he should be able to reach Yuuichirou and the third youma without getting hit. Using almost all that was left of his strength, Nephrite called his Kharandha'i greatsword to him. It shimmered into his hand. "Help me rescue my friend from this evil," he said to it in his native tongue. He ran towards the last youma, which was still holding Yuuichirou in a strangling grip, and drove the sword right through the youma's chest. The youma made a gurgling sound and fell to the floor, releasing its grip on Yuui. Mazz Destrukshun disappeared into the off-stage maze of wings, curtains, and scenery.

Nephrite, still holding the sword, and Tuxedo Mask picked up Yuuichirou, who was by now semi-unconscious, and dragged him out the exit. Behind him, Nephrite heard Sailor Moon call out, "Moon Scepter Elimination!" followed by the death-screams of the other two youma. That moon-scepter thing was a new one on him; he was glad he wouldn't be on the receiving end of it.

Sailor Moon caught up with the three men and they ran, dragging Yuuichirou, to the BMW. Nephrite stuffed Yuuichirou into the back seat and dropped his sword on the floor. Sailor Moon climbed into the other side of the back seat. Nephrite got into the driver's seat and started the car while Tuxedo Mask was still climbing into the passenger-side seat. Tuxedo Mask had barely closed his door when Nephrite pushed the gas pedal all the way to the floor and the Beemer screeched out of the parking lot.

Nephrite raced the car through the heavy late-afternoon traffic, keeping an eye constantly in the rear-view mirror, watching for pursuit. At last, satisfied that the enemy wasn't following them, at least not by car, he checked on his passengers. All three of them sat rigid and pale, faces frozen in wide-eyed grimaces of terror. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"We're all going to freaking die!" Tuxedo Mask choked out.

"Don't worry. I'm an excellent driver." Nephrite skillfully changed lanes to avoid an oncoming delivery truck.

"Eh-heh," Tux replied weakly. For some reason he didn't sound convinced.

* * * * * * * *

The poker game had been a rousing success, at least for Naru. She had amassed most of the chocolate caramels into a huge pile in front of her. The other girls had all folded, and now Naru was sharing out the candies with them, and setting aside a pile for Usagi, who otherwise would be ticked that she missed out on the candy.

There was a squealing of brakes and tires from the parking lot. "They're back!" Naru said. She jumped up, scattering chocolates on the floor, and ran outside, followed closely by Rei and the other girls. Nephrite was the first to get out of the car. He leaned against the open door for a moment, then turned and smiled at Naru and the other girls. He shouted into the car, "You guys can move now. We're back!"

Tuxedo Mask, Sailor Moon, and Yuuichirou climbed out of the car, looking pale and shaken. All the transformations faded away, leaving people and car in their normal appearances. "That man is a menace to the public safety!" Mamoru said.

"Nonsense," said Nephrite. "I've never been in an accident." Then he leaned against the car again and closed his eyes. Naru ran to him. He was pale and trembling. She put her hands on his shoulders. "Nephrite, are you ok? What's wrong?"

He put his arms around her. "Just a little tired, love. I'm ok."

Yuuichirou and Rei stood with their arms tightly around each other, while Yuuichirou tried to reassure Rei that, despite nearly being kidnapped by monsters and then being a passenger in a car driven by Nephrite, he was fine. "Plus, I won the audition."

"Oh, shut up, Yuui." Rei smiled through the tears of relief on her face.

"It was awesome, you guys," Usagi said. "You should have seen it. After Yuui got the job, the roadies turned into youma and were dragging him away, and Nephrite was blasting the Lords and everyone else with energy balls, and Tuxedo Mask got one of the youma right in the eyes with a rose, and I kicked one right in the head, totally nailed him, and then Nephrite made this sword appear out of nowhere and stabbed this other youma right through the middle...."

Usagi chattered on as they all went into Rei's house. No wonder Nephrite was so exhausted, Naru thought. Inside, they all sat at the low dining table, still rehashing the entire event, while Rei phoned for pizza. With a tired groan, Nephrite collapsed onto his back, taking Naru down with him. He pulled Naru on top of him, wrapped his arms around her, and kissed her, long, slow, and deep.

"Ahem," Mamoru said after a moment. Nephrite opened one eye and looked at the younger man. Mamoru said, "Save it for the bedroom, you guys."

Naru blushed and hid her face in Nephrite's hair. "Hey, saving the world is hard work," Nephrite said. "Don't I deserve a little fun?"

"He's absolutely right, you know, Mamoru," Usagi said. "We just helped save the world too, you know." She looked Mamoru in the eyes, practically puckering her lips at him.

Mamoru blushed while Yuuichirou, Makoto, and Minako snickered.

* * * * * * * *

"Well, that was a rousing success," Kunzite muttered. He took several gulps of red wine, trying to wash the taste of total ignominious defeat out of his mouth. This had been one of the most humiliating days of his long life.

"You guys really screwed that up," Jasper said. He hadn't called the Lords to his apartment for this dressing-down. Rather he had gone to their place, to show that they couldn't hide from him. "Those monster things were totally lame."

"Only because you wouldn't give us enough energy to do it properly!" Zoisite said. "It takes at least two or three times a normal human's energy to create a really useful youma."

"You could have at least given us enough energy to do our own attacks," Jadeite added.

"I think the real problem," Kunzite said, "was that Sailor Moon and Company were already suspicious."

"How could they have been?" Jadeite asked.

"Because King Jasper's little antics have been getting into the newspapers every week. Don't you think that by now the Senshi would know to be suspicious whenever weird things start happening?"

"So now it's my fault," the King said.

"Frankly, my King, I think it is." Kunzite's face grew pale and a light sweat broke out on his forehead, but he continued speaking despite his fear. "You would do well to control your appetites and be more discreet."

Jasper grinned and pointed a forefinger at Kunzite. Black lightning shot out of the finger, knocking the silver-haired General clear across the room and taking out an antique table and priceless vase at the same time.

Zoisite screamed, "Kunzite!" and ran to his lover's side. Once he determined that Kunzite was still alive, he glared at the king. "Damn you, you could have killed him!"

Jasper smiled again. "I know. Now, does anyone else want to blame me for your screwups?"

Though they hated themselves for it, Jadeite and Zoisite remained silent.

"Good. Jadeite, do you have the pictures ready?"

Looking disgusted, Jadeite threw a manila envelope onto the glass-topped coffee table. Jasper peered into the envelope and expressed his appreciation for the contents in highly obscene terms. "I don't think this will work, King Jasper," Jadeite said. "As I understand it, Mamoru and Usagi have been separated before, but they always get back together, and their separations never affect the Tuxedo Mask - Sailor Moon partnership. According to Kunzite, even when Tuxedo Mask was under Beryl's control, he ended up protecting Sailor Moon as often as not."

"But they've never actually hated each other before, have they?"

"Not that I know of, but still....Those pictures are so obviously fake."

Jasper laid a hand across the envelope. Black lightning flashed out of his hand, surrounded the envelope, and was absorbed. "Don't matter." He handed the envelope back to Jadeite. "Make sure this gets mailed. Now, when are you going to get that red-haired chick for me? I'm getting tired of waiting."

Zoisite glared at him again. "It isn't that easy. We can't get close to her. She's always with Nephrite, the bastard -- I can't believe he tried to kill us today -- or the Sailor Senshi. It's almost like he knows not to leave her alone."

"After you kidnapped her before, he probably does know," Jadeite said.

"Look, losers," Jasper said, "You want to get back at that Nephrite dude for trying to waste you, take down some of the Sailor Senshi, and make me happy? GET THAT GIRL FOR ME!" He teleported from the apartment without another word. Jadeite and Zoisite scowled after him.

* * * * * * * *