File no. O 123 a in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 15th day of the 9th moon, A. P. 658:

Questioning of Toranawa Isila-san by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of Kunzite?

Toranawa-san: I'm...not sure. I've been permit- I mean, I've seen him so few times.

Q: How do you feel about that?

T: I am his mother! How do you think I feel about not meeting my own child?

Q: Please explain.

T: It doesn't matter. He's strong and I fear him. I... I don't want to love him, but I can't help it. I'm terribly sorry to bother you like this, but I feel like you are stealing him from me.

Q: Would you rather have taken care of him on your own?

T: Yes. No. I don't think I would have managed. Are there many more questions? I'm tired and would like to rest.

Q: I believe this was all. Thank you for your cooperation.

Kunzite
I did not like to think of her as my mother. Love her I might, and I could hardly deny the urge to protect her that rose in me when I thought about her, but it was very obvious that she was very weak, and by associating with her, I would become weak, and there was nothing so detestable as weakness. And with a few, spectacular exceptions, people who cared for me, or whom I cared for, used to disappear from my life. If I were to feel strongly for her, that would be used. Not necessarily against me, but still used, and that would dirty and destroy the emotion. It was better, far better and far safer, to think of her as a sad angel from a sky that I would never reach.

Dutifully I entered the little chamber, as I did the same time the same day every moon. She lived in a suit of rooms in the real palace, not in the building that I inhabited with the others, and I looked curiously around me on my way to her rooms. I was never permitted to go off anywhere, though, and my interest had faded over time, as there came nothing new to the old sights.

My mother's rooms were very different from my own; comparably small, their every surface covered in pieces of furniture of the most different styles. It was tasteful, but seemed somewhat chaotic to me, used as I was to the Spartan simpleness and emptiness of the Shitennou Complex.

Most of all, Isila herself was very different from the people I was used to, very far from the energetic, strong and forceful persons populating my reality. No one weak or corruptible was allowed near the Shitennou. My mother was different from that, very much different from that. What strength she held within her flowed deep and slumbering, never awakened and never used.

There was a sad, soft beauty to her, a caring and warmth in the small smile that was hers. She was not even forty, yet age had already drawn lines through her face. She was clearly no sort of a magician; such a person's aging was slowed when he reached his full power, completely or just very subtly depending on his strength. But even a fully human body should not look old at her age, but she did. However discreet they were, and however untouched by grey her hair was, the signs were there and they were noticeable, and from the portraits I'd seen, I'd gathered that they had appeared when I came into her life. There was a guilt in that, though a small one; I had marred her beauty, but I wasn't sure how much I cared about her, and her true enchantment lay not in her face. But I seemed to be the only one to notice that.

"Kunzite," she greeted with happiness in that soft, sad smile. "Come in, dear child."

Dragging the corners of my mouth upward, I did so.

She did not embrace me, as she had used to before, had not done that for almost three years. I had no idea why that was, but was quite confident that it was knowledge I would be happier off without.

"Why don't you sit down?" she asked with a gesture towards a silk-clad sofa. "I've made some tea."

I sat obediently as she went into another room, returning a moment later with a familiar tea tray that she placed on the table before me.

"Here we go." She leaned forward in the padded chair opposite me, filling a cup and handing it to me.

"Thank you." Taking a sip from it, I almost spit the contents out again, then closed my eyes and swallowed, hoping she hadn't noticed my mien. The tea was even sweeter than usual, enough so to sicken my teeth.

Holding the cup gingerly and at a sound distance from my mouth, I turned my gaze upward to look at her. She regarded me calmly, her expression unreadable.

"Do you like it?" She was holding a cup herself and didn't seem to mind the taste its contents.

"Yes. Thank you. It might be a little sweet, but it's really good."

"Sweet?" She seemed a bit confused, then sighed softly. "Children usually like things sweet. I forget that you...are not quite like other children. You're much older than those nine years, aren't you?"

I didn't know what to say to that, and she continued, "You always were. You spoke as though ten years older when you were five, and your mind...I'm sorry, I just don't know. I shouldn't say things like these, should I?" She lifted a hand to her face, appearing more confused than ever. Her eyes were on the verge of spilling over.

"No," I agreed in a calm, soft voice. "You probably shouldn't."

"No," she said, wiping furiously at her cheeks. "There are so many things I shouldn't do. I'm sorry. I shouldn't cry like this. I'm sorry, Kunzite, I'm so sorry..."

There was more, but I couldn't make it out over the sound of her sobbing. I saw the tears drip from her eyes, past the hands she'd buried her face in, falling into her lap and making dark spots on the pale blue fabric.

Rising and walking around the table, I stood close to her and stroked her hair as she cried. I didn't know if it made any difference to her, but at least the crying wasn't worsening.

By the time they came to pick me up, she was sitting back in the chair, her eyes red-rimmed and moist but no longer leaking. She held my hand tightly, and it was when I answered her tired little smile with one of my own that I felt a pricking in my own eyes. Gently but purposefully, I withdrew my hand and walked out with the guards.

"Goodbye, Kunzite, dear child."

I turned my head at her words, and made a smile for her. "Goodbye, Mother."

* * * * * * * *

File no. O 123 b in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 16th day of the 9th moon, A. P. 658:

Questioning of Tennou Kunzite by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: You met your mother recently, did you not?

Kunzite: Yes, I did.

Q: What do you think of her? What are your feelings toward her?

K: I don't think very much about her. I'm not sure why I ought to see her. She always cries.

Q: Does that bother you?

K: In a way. She seems so sad and helpless. Why do you ask?

Q: Do you love her?

K: I think I would have if I had had the opportunity to get to know her.

Q: What do you usually talk about?

K: Nothing much. Are you going to answer my question?

Q: Nothing much as in...?

K: I suppose that's as clear an answer as I'm going to get, huh? Oh well. She usually says something about how big I've grown, or asks what we're doing on training, but before I can reply she mostly starts crying.

Q: Do you want to spend more time with her? Less?

K: I think she would die of sadness if I never saw her again. Otherwise... I can't have a family, so what's the point in longing for one? I'd rather just forget about it.

Q: How about the people around you? The teachers and nurses?

K: Nothing to say.

Q: You're certain? Well, that will be all then. You may leave.

* * * * * * * *

File no. O 124 a in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 24th day of the 11th moon, A. P. 658:

Questioning of Yakzama Mesala-san by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of Nephrite?

Yakzama-san: He is quite arrogant for such an early age. He has no problems understanding or drawing conclusions, but he doesn't like to share those.

Q: Do you find him obedient?

Y: Yes and no. He's quite like any child in that aspect. Generally he obeys, though often grumbling, but sometimes he get it into his head to defy. I've been forced to be harsh with him at a few occasions. I don't claim to understand what it was that triggered that; the things we argued over weren't especially important, it was more as though he was merely rebelling against authority. But I can't make a very covering opinion; I don't spend much time with him outside of the lessons.

Q: There are no problems for either of you with mother as teacher for her child?

Y: No. I don't really feel like I am his mother. Giving birth is one thing, holding the child and knowing he's yours to love forever quite another, and I've only experienced the first. Which is as it should be.

Q: This was all, then. Thank you for your cooperation.

Nephrite
I rested my back against the dark tree of the wall, carefully trying to smooth out any expression on my face, turn in into an impersonal, inscrutable mask. I might be a child, but I'd lived all my lives surrounded by masters of deceit and a number of reasons to perfect my own skills in the genre.

Mesala-san - I was not going to call her mother - was definitely one of those. Especially as she was one of the most provocative persons I had to face, one of the most probably to make my temper flare and my mask tear away, to render me burning with a familiar frustration. Honestly, they wouldn't let me decide anything for myself, not even the details. Certainly, if I'd been able to choose, I wouldn't have worn this uncomfortable uniform jacket.

I wasn't an idiot, I could understand perfectly well that I had to train and learn so that I could use my powers to protect humanity and all that. It was just that all of that was fairly abstract to me, and since the grand course of my life was already set in stone, I thought it would have been fair to at least let me decide about the trivia myself.

Rubbing my face impatiently, I stole a glance at the clock on the opposite wall and sighed. Mesala had asked me to wait outside after the lesson, but obviously she wasn't in a hurry.

Drumming my fingers against the wall, I absently wondered how long it would take for the sound to drive me mad. Tense and bored in equal measures, I thought back on my dreams. They had been worsening, as of late, and though I didn't remember much of them when I woke up, the ominous feeling remained. Worse, Naru had said that the strange dream that the two of us shared would be closed to me.

The Grail must gather its power, be if for usage or for releasing me, and therefore I must go to sleep. We will meet again, yakusouku, but it will be a while. Live well, Nephrite of the Stars.

No. I could not, would not, believe that I wasn't going to see her again for...what? Weeks? Months? Years? It was impossible. But when I'd tried to contact her, to access our shared dreamscape, I hadn't found anything. It was as though she had never existed. My last hope was a technique she'd demonstrated to me not long ago, something she called "asking the stars." She claimed that it was them that had told her mother to create the Grail. To be completely truthful, the entire concept sounded suspicious to my skeptical ears, but I would trust Naru with my life, and it wasn't as though I had anything to lose by trying. Even if that had been the case, I still had to find her.

So immersed was I in my thoughts that I jumped with surprise when Mesala's hand tapped me on the shoulder.

"Where did you fly off to?" she asked

"Nowhere important," I replied. "You wanted to talk to me?"

"Yes," she agreed, her tone becoming more serious, more distant, turning into her teacher-voice. "You've seemed distracted for a while. Is there anything bothering you?"

"No, nothing." After all, it was not as though I would willingly talk to her about anything.

"Then I will want the report paper that was to be handed in last week, and a thorough explanation and apology for its delay."

Oh, dammit, I'd forgotten about that.

"Yes, Mesala-san," I said meekly, having absolutely no intentions of ever finishing that piece of meaningless work. Or perhaps I had better just do it, if I wanted to get her off my case anytime soon. I sighed.

"Is there a problem with that?" Her tone sharp.

"No, Mesala-san."

"Good. Then I'll be expecting it tomorrow."

I cast a tragic glare at the empty wall opposite me, and an angry one at her back as she walked away. Then I walked back to my room in order to complete that godforsaken paper. My life would be a lot easier if Mesala could just stop bossing me around.

Or care for me as a person and not as a thing to be used.

Shut up, I told the unwanted thought. Shut up.

It did.

* * * * * * * *

File no. O 124 b in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 25th day of the 11th moon, A. P. 658:

Questioning of Tennou Nephrite by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: Your mother is teaching you and the others some strategy and hand-to-hand combat, right?

Nephrite: Yes. But you already know that.

Q: What do you think of your mother?

N: She hardly appreciates being thought of as a mother. She's mostly like any teacher. Sometimes it feels different, but that passes quickly.

Q: You don't have a problem with having your mother as your teacher?

N: No, wouldn't call it a problem. It doesn't concern you anyway.

Q: Of course it does. But how about the other people around you? The other teachers and the nurses?

N: They're like they've always been.

Q: That would be all. You may leave.

* * * * * * * *

File no. 125 a in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 30th day of the 5th moon, A. P. 661:

Questioning of Merida Sosaya-san by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of Jadeite?

Merida-san: He's shy. Clumsy. He suffers by comparison to the others.

Q: You take care of the children to a certain extent, so I'm sure you know them all quite well. Do you have a relationship with Jadeite that differs from the ones you have with the others?

M: I don't really think so. Perhaps I'm a bit more critical to him.

Q: Do you have any trouble keeping a professional attitude toward Jadeite?

M: I would ruin too much if I did.

Q: That was all, then. Thank you for your cooperation.

Jadeite
I had never been a strong child. We both knew it, and we both hated it. In my case that was because she did, as I didn't detest the weakness in itself half as much as the way she made me suffer for it.

In fact, even my very first memory of her was painted in colors of disdain and disapproval; I didn't remember why, but I knew she had been angry with me. Very angry. First she screamed at me, then she made me feel even worse by simply staring at me with those cold eyes the color of a lifeless autumn sea. It was the kind of look that told me that she had never wanted me, that I would never deserve her.

I didn't know, supposed I never would know, whether I would have felt this way if she hadn't encouraged it. Undeniably, I was the blandest of the bunch. Kunzite was cold authority and power, Zoisite a glimmering of loveliness and temper, and Nephrite, in all his ironical rhetoric, never once doubted his own abilities.

With my present view of the world, it was impossible to be completely comfortable in such a company, but I wondered, often I wondered, what might have been.

But no. I was such a loser. She'd never missed an opportunity to tell me that.

And she wouldn't do that now either, I realized, as I saw her approaching. Resigned, I let the katana fall down into the sand at my feet.

"That wasn't very good, Jadeite." Her tone was calm and collected, but hinting at rage over my everlasting failure.

"No, mother." I kept tone level and devoid of emotions, my gaze locked at the hem of her skirt. It didn't actually sting to hear this anymore - I'd moved on to a dull, permanent ache somewhere in my chest that I was perfectly capable of maintaining on my own.

"You will have to practice more. That last swing was beneath critique. Come on."

Carefully keeping my gaze where it was, I informed her that I had a lesson to attend in ten minutes' time.

"That doesn't matter." Her voice was strictly restrained, the tone unarguable and matter-of-factly. "You are a Tennou, you cannot afford mistakes or near-hits. If you cannot accomplish better as it is, you must work harder. You do not think you can leave a training ground until you have mastered its art, do you? Jadeite, you have to learn to pay the consequences of your misgivings."

"Yes, mother." I bent down and picked up the sword.

She stepped back and folded her arms over her chest, clearly intent on watching me through.

It was with a sigh I took up the first position. It wasn't that I'd miss a day of long classes, but rather the free time I would have to sacrifice to do the extra homework. She wouldn't let me off the hook until either I completed the task to her satisfaction or the sun went down - and it was only midday yet.

Practice with and without weapons was required, not because I was supposed to have any real use for it, but to teach concentration and the spirit of combat. Nephrite was probably the only one enjoying it. I myself only wished that the light armour I wore could protect me from her acid words rather than the strikes that would probably never be aimed at me.

* * * * * * * *

File no. O 125 b in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 31st day of the 5th moon, A. P. 661:

Questioning of Tennou Jadeite by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of your mother?

Jadeite: Does it matter?

Q: Of course it does. You meet your mother quite a lot, especially compared to the others. What are your opinions of her, as a mother and as a nurse?

J: She's terrible as a mother. As a nurse I suppose she's nice. She's nice to the others. But I'm not good enough. I always fail her somehow. I can't compare to them, I'm too...bland. But I don't know how to change.

Q: It seems you have a troublesome relationship with her?

J: I just don't know how I can please her.

Q: Do you think she should be removed from her work with you?

J: No. It might be a relief, but then I could never redeem myself in her eyes.

Q: How about the teachers and the other nurses?

J: They're all right. I don't have any problems with them.

Q: This was all, then. You may leave.

* * * * * * * *

File no. O 126 a in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 24th day of the 8th moon, A. P. 663:

Questioning of Yakzama Mesala-san by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of Zoisite?

Yakzama-san: Much the same as I think of Nephrite, actually.

Q: Zoisite was transferred to you during rather dramatic circumstances; you don't feel that that has affected your relationship with him to differ from the one you have with Nephrite?

Y: They were both placed in me artificially, so I don't think that those events have changed the way I think of them. They are both children that are mine and not mine, I don't think I can explain better than that.

Q: How he is coming along on the lessons?

Y: It's not his subjects, that's for certain. He's bored by strategy, and hates physical combat. But he's bright, he manages.

Q: No troubles teaching your own child?

Y: No. Not with this one either. As I have already explained, I try not to regard them as my children.

Q: What do you think of your relationship with him in general?

Y: It is what it has to be. He's easy to love and easy to hate. I do my best to do neither.

Q: That was all, then. Thank you for your cooperation.

Zoisite
I was equally aware that glaring like this was very immature, and that I didn't give a damn about it. May Mesala-san rot in Jigoku forever!

I detested strategy, I abhorred hand-to-hand combat, and most of all I hated being treated like an idiot child. Sure, I wasn't grown up, but I wasn't stupid either, despite what some people tended to think. Oh, she'd never outright said that I was dumb, but then, she hardly needed to.

'You must concentrate; even if an idea is brilliant, it is worthless if not carried all the way through.'

'See, child, this is how it should be done...'

'You're so small yet, hopefully you'll mature with time...'

"Goddammit," I sneered, kicking angrily at the wall. I never managed to remember that doing that was a very bad idea indeed, but when the force of them impact roared through my foot, I didn't understand how I could ever have forgotten it. "Itai! Itai yo!"

I would not - I would not - cry here and have them all come running to lecture me, but it hurt, and despite my best efforts to keep them a bay, a few tears rolled down my cheeks.

That, of course, was when Nephrite came strolling. I didn't get it - how did he manage to always show up whenever I wanted to be alone? Every single time I made a fool of myself, inevitably, Nephrite arrived with that smug, arrogant grin over his face.

Now, he stopped his walking and regarded me interestedly.

"Get lost," I sneered unfriendly.

"Bright and polite as usual, I see." I stared at him warningly, and thankfully he chuckled and teleported before uttering any other unwelcome remarks. I cursed viciously at his disappearance anyway, irked by the fact that I still hadn't completely managed the art of warping that that jerk performed with such ease.

"Gods, Zoisite," an amused voice said behind me. "Do you even know what that means?"

"Kunzite-sama!" I flashed him a brilliant smile. "Where have you been all day?"

"Down in the library. Now, what made you lose your temper this time?"

It all seemed rather distant now, so I only shrugged, "I had this stupid lesson, and then Nephrite appeared..."

"I can imagine."

"By the way, Kunzite-sama..." It was a question I had been dwelling on for a while but that I hadn't had the opportunity to ask until now. "What was my mother like? My first mother?"

"Lady Tolina? I didn't know her very well, as I was quite small myself when she died, but there's a painting of her in the library. Considering that you aren't overly found of that place, I assume you haven't seen it?"

"No, I haven't." I'd visited her grave, ironically, but I'd never heard of any painting.

"Then would you like to go there?"

I nodded happily, grabbing ahold of his hand as we walked. His fingers closed around mine in a very reassuring manner.

Hidden behind a terrible many bookshelves, there was indeed a tableau that, according to the inscription on the frame, portrayed Eskara Tolina. Despite the serious look on her face, despite the strictness of her clothes, there was like a shimmer of defiant energy over her, as though she was a creature far too light and elusive to be caught in paint this way.

"What was she like?" I asked at length.

"I hear she was quite like you, reckless and charming and pretty."

"Pretty?" I said doubtfully. She was slender and good-looking, yes, but beautiful...?

"For a human, little one. Not as magicians go." He was quiet for a while, then said, "I think she would have liked you."

I rested my head against his arm. "Wish she had. Mesala sure doesn't"

"She does have a tendency of being quite unfriendly," Kunzite-sama admitted.

The woman in question was a strange one. What bothered me the most was not the fact that she wasn't nice to me, but rather that she ignored me. The few times she showed indications of caring, or even love, were always immediately followed by sheer disagreeableness, as though she wanted to make up for the slap in discipline, punish me for getting to her. I'd learned long ago to keep away from her.

* * * * * * * *

File no. 126 b in the S. A. main bank in the Castle of the Sun, dated 25th day of the 8th moon, A. P. 663

Questioning of Tennou Zoisite by representative of the Queen Relisiana of the Golden Kingdom of Earth:

Questioner: What do you think of your mother?

Zoisite: Depends.

Q: How do you feel about her teaching you strategy and hand-to-hand combat?

Z: Generally uncomfortable? Strategy's boring, I hate hand-to-hand combat. It's not fair. Why do I always have to get beaten up? Besides, I'll never have any use for it! Why would I do something stupid like that when I can simply use magic? And she's such a pai - we're not always getting along perfectly well.

Q: How come?

Z: She forces me to do all these idiotic things that I don't want to.

Q: Do you think it would be different with another teacher?

Z: Not really.

Q: As her child, what do you think of her?

Z: She's not my mother! She's Nephrite's mother, not mine.

Q: What has caused you to feel that way?

Z: That I don't like her. That she doesn't like me. I want a mother who cares for me. My real mother would have been nice to me. At least she could have been.

Q: Do you think her role as a mother affects her behavior as a teacher?

Z: She equally mean inside and outside of the classroom, and she's as nasty to everyone.

Q: How about the other teachers and the nurses?

Z: Some of them are terrible. Most are nice, though. I'm bored. Can I go now?

Q: Yes, actually, this was all.