Shadows of Hope
by Moon Momma

Chapter 11

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"I don't understand," Naru said, looking around the small park near the OSA*P shop. "Uranus and Neptune said they'd meet us here at 11:30." Her words were scripted, part of the trap. She knew where the Senshi were; Sailors Uranus and Neptune, along with the other Senshi, were hidden nearby, waiting to see if Nephrite would take the bait. Naru found herself torn by hope that he would and the fear that something could go terribly wrong with the plan to try to heal him.

"Does this mean we have to go back inside?" Toshiro whined, just as he'd been told to. There was sincerity behind his acting, though. Naru had kept all the children inside the apartment with her and whichever Senshi was on guard duty for several days. Now it was Saturday, a good time to take the children to the park for a short picnic, so they could get out of the apartment and get some fresh air. The idea was that Nephrite, if he were watching, would believe that they had been frightened into hiding. Hopefully he would be getting impatient, and would jump at this rare opportunity to carry out his mission. Despite the tension of waiting to spring the trap, or perhaps because of it, Naru was glad to get out of the apartment. After being cooped up for several days, she and the children were all about to start climbing the walls.

"No, not yet," Naru answered Toshiro. "We can wait a few more minutes. In the meantime, let's get out the sandwiches." She spread a blanket on the fresh spring grass, then sat down with the children and handed out the sandwiches and bottles of juice. The kids didn't have to fake the eagerness with which they dug into the food; even Jasmine had finally gotten her appetite back. Naru could only nibble at her own sandwich, though. Her stomach felt all knotted up. She hoped Nephrite would stay away so that nothing bad would happen to him or any of the children; she was anxious for him to appear so they could get this over with.

The children finished their sandwiches and started on the cookies and cut-up fruit Naru had packed. Naru sighed as she picked at her own lunch. It looked like Nephrite wasn't going to show up, and they were going to have to set up another trap for him....

A bolt of black light suddenly shot past Naru and hit Meiko square in the chest, knocking the boy onto his back. He screamed in pain, and doubled over, trying to protect himself. Naru snapped her head around towards the source of the black power. Nephrite stood several meters away; the beam of darkness was shooting out of his extended right hand. His eyes were narrowed in concentration, his face set with determination to get what he had come for. "Papa!" Mitsu cried.

Meiko's screams got louder as the force that was overwhelming his body made him shake with helpless, jerky seizures. His chest started to bulge out, as though the crystal inside him was about to break through the skin. "No!" Naru screamed, and threw herself over the boy. But she couldn't block the dark power; it cut through her body like fiery knives. "Nephrite, stop! You'll kill him!" she pled.

His face remained cold and hard, but his hand seemed to waver slightly. The pain shooting through Naru's chest ebbed very briefly, then intensified. "Nephrite, don't do this! You've got to stop!" she yelled, sobbing. Beneath her, in her arms, her future son was crying and shaking like a hurt animal. Where are the Senshi? she thought. Sailor Moon, hurry up! "Please, Nephrite, stop hurting him!"

Again Nephrite's hand faltered, lowering ever so slightly, and the pain abated just a bit. A brief look of confusion passed over Nephrite's handsome face. "Nephrite," Naru breathed.

Then his face hardened again. He brought his hand back up to shoulder level to renew the assault. Suddenly, another voice rang through the air, "Moon Healing Escalation!"

Naru looked at Sailor Moon to see her circumscribe a circle the height of her body, using an elaborate gold staff set with a huge, multifaceted crystal. "Imperium Crystal Obliteration!" Sailor Moon shouted. Usagi had explained this spell to Naru; with it, the Silver Crystal would obliterate whatever evil had seated itself inside Nephrite's soul. If there was nothing there but evil, he would be destroyed.

A blinding bolt of light, colorless yet sparkling with countless colors, shot out from the Crystal. Mitsu cried out, doubling over and clutching her chest. Naru grabbed her and pulled her close. Above Mitsu's cries and Meiko's sobbing, Naru heard a dreadful, inhuman, heart-ripping scream. Nephrite, she thought numbly.

The pain shooting through her chest died suddenly, and Mitsu and Meiko fell silent, though they still trembled and sniffled with lingering sobs. Naru remained hunched over on the blanket, holding the children close to her. She was afraid to look.

She felt a soft touch on her shoulder. "Naru," Minako whispered. "Go to him. I'll take care of the kids." The blonde girl sat down between Meiko and Mitsu and put her arms around them. Toshiro crawled over and wrapped his arms around his future mother, and Jasmine huddled close against the group. "Go on," Mina said. "I think it's okay."

Naru finally dared to look at where Nephrite had been standing. He was on his knees on the grass, bowed over, his arms wrapped tightly around himself. At first, all Naru could think was that he hadn't been destroyed. Slowly, she stood and walked over to him, afraid to hope that the plan to heal him had worked. "Nephrite?" she asked.

He looked up at her. The hard, cold expression on his face was gone. Tears shimmered in his blue eyes and made tracks down his face. Then he turned his face away from her, and stared down at his hands. "What have I done?" he whispered, his voice harsh with emotion. He bowed over again, his broad shoulders shaking as he wept.

Naru sank down on her knees beside him and pulled him close to her. "It's okay," she murmured, stroking his long hair and rocking him back and forth in her arms. "It's okay, Nephrite. The children are all right. It's okay."

After a few minutes he fell still, then straightened up and looked at her. The tenderness on his face made her catch her breath; it was the exact same expression he had had just before he died in her arms. Gently, he brushed some stray strands of hair out of her face. Then he smiled, the hesitant, uneven smile she remembered from before, and whispered, "Naru." He got to his feet, and Naru trailed behind him as he walked over to the children. Meiko and Mitsu stared up at him mutely, fear mixed with eagerness in their faces. Nephrite nodded to Mina. "Princess Minako." Eyes wide, Mina nodded back at him.

Nephrite knelt in front of his children. "Are you all right, Meiko-kun?"

"I'm okay, Papa," the boy stammered.

Nephrite said, "Let me see." He lifted up his son's t-shirt and examined his chest, probing gently. The he gathered Meiko to him in a sudden, fierce hug. "Thank goodness you're not hurt, Meiko. Can you ever forgive me?"

Meiko wrapped his arms tightly around his father's neck and nodded against his shoulder. Nephrite looked at Mitsu then, and freed one arm from its grip around Meiko to pull his daughter close. "Mitsu, are you all right? Did I hurt you too? I'm so sorry, Mitsu-chan."

"It's all right, Daddy. It wasn't you. It's because I've got Queen Serenity's crystal inside me, and -" She stopped and looked up at Naru, a stricken look on her face.

Naru smiled at her. "You can tell him."

"Okay." Mitsu turned back to her father. "I've got Queen Serenity's Silver Crystal inside me, and it hurts when Sailor Moon is close by with her crystal. 'Cause they're the same, you know."

"I know, Mitsu-hime. I know." Nephrite held his children close another moment, burying his face against their curly red hair. "We did the right thing, sending all of you away. You're all safe, thank goodness." Finally he let go and stood up. "You two stay here with..." He glanced over at Naru and smiled. "With your mother. I've got to decide what to do next."

"Lord Nephrite?"

He paused at Jasmine's hesitant voice, and turned towards the girl. "What is it, Jasmine?" he asked.

"What about my dads, and Lord Jadeite?"

"If I can be freed, I'm sure they can too. That's what I'm going to figure out how to do." Then, with a swirl of white and crimson light, he disappeared.

Naru stood still, staring at where Nephrite had been. She wanted him so fiercely, she didn't know how she could bear waiting for however long it would be until he really came back. She barely knew him, this handsome, proud, dignified man who was yet so gentle and kind with his children, but she loved him with every atom in her body and every thought of her mind. Once again, she remembered the way he had kissed her last week, felt the weakening of her knees, the spreading warmth deep inside her body. She wondered if he only kissed like that when he was evil.

Meiko's voice distracted her from her thoughts. "Is my dad okay now?" he was asking Sailor Moon.

"I think he's fine," Sailor Moon replied. "Don't you think so, Naru?"

Naru reminded herself that she would eventually find out about the kissing. A smile spread across her face until she thought her cheeks would split. "Yeah, he's fine," she said.

* * * * * * * *

That night, after the children finally fell asleep, Usagi and Naru sat up late, talking. "So what do you think he's going to do?" Naru asked. She wore a long blue nightshirt, and sat on one end of the futon-sofa, her knees pulled up to her chin, her arms wrapped around her legs.

"I don't know," Usagi said. She was sitting cross-legged on the other end of the sofa, in shorts and a pink shirt. "He might stay here and see if the other Lords come after the crystals, then help us trap them and heal them. Or he might go back and try to fight... whatever it is, by himself."

"Oh, I hope not."

"Actually, that is more or less what I intend to do."

Naru and Usagi whipped their heads around at the sound of Nephrite's voice. He was standing in the dining area of the room, behind the couch. "Good evening," he said.

"Don't sneak up on me like that!" Usagi yelled.

Nephrite smiled a little, unruffled. "On the contrary, Sailor Moon, you need to be more alert. I could have destroyed you, and you never would have known what hit you."

"Then why didn't you do that when you came here the first time?"

Nephrite walked around to the front of the sofa, and sat on the low magazine table that stood there. "I was hoping that the children would come with me voluntarily. It would have made the crystals easier to remove from them."

"Because you didn't want to hurt them," Naru said. "Even when you were evil, you couldn't bring yourself to hurt your own children if you didn't have to."

Nephrite gave her an appreciative look and one of his slight, uneven smiles. Naru shifted, tucking her feet modestly underneath her. Idly, she thought that, for a man that she really didn't know all that well, he had spent a lot of time with her when she was in her pajamas. "You're right," Nephrite said, "though I never would have admitted it to myself, while I was bound as I was. I realized quickly that they wouldn't come with me willingly, and that I would have to take what I wanted by force, but I disliked the necessity."

"That's sort of what I thought," Usagi said. "I hoped I was right, and that the healing spell wouldn't destroy you." All three of them were silent for a few seconds. "So, what are you going to do now?" Usagi asked.

Naru looked down at her hands, which had clenched themselves into fists in her lap. She wasn't sure she wanted to know what he was going to do.

"I'm going to remove my crystal from Meiko, then take Mitsu back with me," Nephrite said. Naru opened her mouth to object, but Nephrite silenced her by holding up his hand. "Just a minute. Let me finish explaining. The royal family, along with the Senshi and a number of soldiers, including my three oldest sons, are trapped in a tower of the Palace. Zoisite set an impenetrable guard spell around the tower. I believe that my crystal will enhance my power enough that I can find a way to release the spell. After I do that, I can take Mitsu to Queen Serenity, who will be able to safely remove the Silver Crystal. With the Silver Crystal, Serenity can free the other Guardians from their bondage. After that, I'll bring the other Guardians back here to reclaim their crystals. From there, hopefully we can banish the Lady of Eternal Night back to where she came from, and finish building the barrier we were trying to build before, to protect Crystal Tokyo."

"That's what the crystals were for?" Usagi asked.

Nephrite nodded. "We were afraid to try the spell; it was very risky. But, given our betrayal during the Silver Millennium, we were also afraid to appear less than completely loyal in the eyes of..." He glanced sideways at Usagi, then hesitated, seeming to weigh his words. "In the eyes of our superior, who had proposed the plan. It turned out we were tricked into building not a barrier but a bridge - the spell, the way we were instructed to work it, was turned inside out. This allowed the Lady of Eternal Night and a number of her minions to enter the Earth dimension and ensnare us into her service."

Naru wasn't sure she understood everything he was saying, but it seemed to make sense to Usagi, because she nodded and said, "I see. But who is the Lady of Eternal Night? You'd think that sooner or later we'd run out of crazies who want to destroy the universe or whatever."

"Actually," Nephrite answered, "the Lady is an old enemy. She's an entity formed of the fused spirits of Beryl and her demon-mistress, Metallia."

"Oh, no!" Usagi whined. "Not again!"

Amusement sparkled in Nephrite's eyes despite his seriousness. "Don't worry, Sailor Moon. This isn't your fight, not this time. This is between Beryl and the Guardians. We owe her a debt, a very great one, for the way she deceived and enslaved us. When we've repaid what we owe her, she'll never be able to harm anyone again."

"Oh," Usagi said, sounding distinctly relieved. "Well, if you're sure you don't need our help..."

He smiled. "I'm sure. All I ask is that you and Naru let me take Mitsu with me, and continue to guard the other children until I come back with the other Lords. Even then, make sure you trust us completely before you let us near the children. Understand?" Usagi nodded, and Nephrite said, "Good. Now, would you be so kind as to let me have a few minutes alone with Naru?"

"Um. Sure. Okay. I'll just go, uh, sit out in the hallway with my book." Usagi stood up, taking her color theory textbook with her. "I'll be right outside if you need me." She gave Naru one more backward look as she slipped out the door.

Nephrite moved from his perch on the magazine table to the spot on the couch that Usagi had vacated. Naru sat still, gazing at him, not daring to speak or even move. After thinking for four and a half years that he was dead - no, he had been dead, she had felt it when his life left him and he sagged limply in her arms - it was so hard to believe that he was really sitting right beside her. There was so much she wanted to say, but she didn't know where she stood with this future version of him.

He spoke first, breaking the awkward silence. "Thank you for looking after the children. I can tell you've been taking good care of them."

She shrugged. "I'm glad they're here. I've been having fun with them, and I would have been lonely..."

Nephrite smiled. "You were dating Umino Gurio. He just recently left to spend a year doing research on tropical insects. He wanted you to go with him, but you finally decided not to."

"How do you know?"

"You told me. In the future."

"Oh." Feeling shy and oddly pleased at the same time, that she would have the chance to tell him things like that and that he would remember them, she relaxed a bit and smiled back at him.

"Has he mentioned someone named Martha in his letters?" Nephrite asked.

"Yes. In the first letter he sent after he arrived in Brazil."

"He and Martha are very happy together, in the future. They're quite prominent in their field, as a research team. They and their son live in the Amazon most of the year. In fact... You know about Jasmine's origins?"

"Yes."

"One of the chemicals used in the procedure was derived from a substance they discovered, that's produced by a butterfly that changes from male to female and back again."

"Wow." Dummy, she thought. Can't you think of anything more interesting to say? But her mind and tongue both felt like they were tied in knots. "That's so... cool." That was really brilliant, Naru-chan.

"I've always thought that was one reason why you were so attached to the girl, because your old friend is partially responsible for her existence." Nephrite smiled, a rather more mischievous grin than Naru had seen on him before. "I'm still not convinced that the world needs any copies of Zoisite's and Kunzite's chromosomes running around, but Jasmine doesn't seem to be a bad sort."

"She's really nice. I like her very much; I feel like she's the little sister I never had."

He grinned again. "You've always been fond of her. Before we had Mitsu, you adopted Jasmine as a part-time daughter."

Naru felt herself blush, though she couldn't help smiling. "It's really going to happen, isn't it?"

He nodded. "Yes, Naru-chan. It's really going to happen."

She wanted to laugh and spin around in circles for joy. Instead, she scrunched up her shoulders, and smiled through tears that pooled in the corners of her eyes.

The silence descended again. Naru wondered if he would kiss her. She wanted him to; she was terrified that he would.

Finally Nephrite spoke again. "Thank you for looking after the children. And don't worry about Mitsu. I'll send her back as soon as I can." He stood to leave.

"Okay." Then Naru remembered a bit of business she needed to discuss with him. "Nephrite, there's something I have to tell you about. I hope you aren't mad."

He sat down, and his look gentled. "I could never be mad at you, Naru-chan. What is it?"

"I decided the kids should go to school. It wasn't good for them to just sit around the apartment all the time, playing video games and waiting for something bad to happen." Nephrite started to chuckle. "What?" Naru asked.

"Nothing. It's just, that's so like you. Always thinking of what's best for the children. Go on."

"Okay." This was strange, she thought. He knew her so well, knew what she would be like in the future - he knew her better than she knew herself. "Anyway, the Senshi didn't think it would be a good idea, because it would be easier to protect them if we kept them all together, and Jasmine would have to go to junior high while the younger kids went to primary school. But Ami - Sailor Mercury - knew about this private school that goes up to eighth grade, so they could all go there. We enrolled them, but, well, it's very expensive, and, well..." She looked at Nephrite, saw only kindness in his face, and plunged ahead. "The Senshi used some magic to convince the people running the school to bill the tuition to Sanjouin Masato when he gets back from his extended trip out of the country."

Nervously, Naru glanced at him again. His blue eyes were twinkling, then he laughed, a rich, full laugh that shook his chest and shoulders. Naru started laughing too, finally feeling completely relaxed. "Well," Nephrite said when he could speak again, "I suppose I do owe them something, for all the trouble I caused them, before. I'll take care of it tomorrow. Sanjouin Masato's funds are still intact, so he can settle the tuition bill and make a donation. All right?"

"All right."

"I'd better go now. I've some things to attend to tonight, then tomorrow after I settle with the school I'll leave with Mitsu. Thank you again, Naru, for caring for them. It's good to see that you're doing well."

Naru couldn't let him go yet. All of a sudden there were questions that she couldn't bear to leave unasked while she had the chance to ask them. "Please wait!"

He looked at her, his eyebrows drawing together in concern. "Is something wrong, Naru?"

"I - I have to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"When - when you were here, before, when you died - did you love me then?"

"Ah." Nephrite looked at her, then reached out his hand, brushing his fingers along her cheek then burying them in her hair. "Of course I loved you. You didn't know?"

"No." The memories of that horrible, confusing, dark time made Naru shiver. "I thought you might, but I didn't know for sure. You never said you did."

"I didn't understand what I was feeling. The concept of love was so very foreign to everything that my life was about... All I knew of it was that strange, twisted, needy thing that Kunzite and Zoisite shared, after their feelings were distorted by Metallia. I knew that what was between you and me wasn't like that, and I knew that you loved me, but I never would have dreamed that I was capable of loving anyone. I didn't understand how I felt about you until my soul slipped free, and then it was too late...." He fell silent, a shadow of thought passing over his face. "I can never tell you how much I regretted not being able to tell you that I loved you. But I did love you. I always will."

He brushed away the tears that had started to trickle down Naru's cheeks. "Thank you," she said, her voice catching.

His hand cupped her cheek another moment, then he withdrew it and smiled. "I know I also promised you a chocolate parfait. We'll do that when I come back to you for good. Okay?"

"Okay." Naru smiled.

"I really had better go now. I've got a lot to do before I go back tomorrow." Nephrite stood up, and Naru followed him to the door. He opened it, and Usagi, who was crouched on the floor, her ear to the door, tumbled over into the room. Nephrite looked down at her, amusement dancing in his eyes. "Good evening, Tsukino Usagi," he said formally, then stepped over her sprawled form and walked down the hall.

"He knew I was out here," Usagi muttered as she got to her feet. "He could have teleported. But no, he had to open the door and embarrass me...."

"You shouldn't have been eavesdropping, Usagi-chan," Naru said, also amused.

"But how could I resist? I wanted to know what happened. So what did happen?" she whispered conspiratorially.

"Nothing. We talked, that's all."

"He didn't even kiss you?" Usagi looked disappointed.

"No, he didn't kiss me. He's married, remember?"

"But he's married to you, so there wouldn't have been anything wrong with it."

"He's married to the future me, not to me now."

"It's the same thing, isn't it? It's still you, right?"

"I don't know. Don't try to confuse me, Usagi. The important thing is he told me he did love me, before. When he died. He loved me, Usagi."

Usagi smiled then, a gentle, slightly sad look on her face. "I knew that, Naru." She perked up again. "Now, come on. I want the whole story." The two friends sat down on the couch again, preparing to gossip the night away while keeping watch over the sleeping children.

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return to Index / go to Chapter 12

The Nephrite and Naru Treasury